I take pride in being who I am and the place that I come from but I also acknowledge and realize that my ancestors had bizzare practices and traditions that they followed and passed on.
While none of their successors seemed to have a problem with that, they never even questioned their validity or relevance.
I recollect how I used to question maa about little things I found different while I grew up and she used to shut me up saying "That's how it is" to which I countered "But why?" and she said "We were told to do so and we did" "But why dint you ever question?" "We din't think about things, just did as we were told. Now stop asking me because I have no answers."
I was unhappy to be left with unanswered questions but I was furious about the unexplained practices more.
For example, women touching feet of their husband's sister (irrespective of their age difference). I always believe those who are younger take blessings from elders.
Women comparing their life to that of their daughter in laws. Mostly referring to their sacrifices, stringent lifestyles they lived and conveniently demeaning every single effort the so called new generation girls make.
The tradition of giving money, gifts to daughters, every single time. I used to have verbal tussles with maa regarding the same. Not just the daughters, their husband's and their families without expecting anything in return and still always falling short of something. Is it in the first place, their duty? Or do they simply get their daughter married an adopt the entire family?
Son in law's being treated as guests, greeted with folded hands, considered a prince from la la land, served hot food while daughter in laws are just free maids who don't deserve to even eat with the other members. Forget hot meals, equal status and good behaviour.
Having a child (preferably a boy) is the top most priority of a girl after marriage. Isn't that a personal decision to make? Isn't it shamelessly barging into someone's privacy?
Is it that none of your ideas, words or deeds matter throughout your life? Is it that if you're a daughter or a daughter's parents everything valueable about you vanishes?
Why is it that parents of girls are treated lesser while they should be worshipped for keeping the balance in the society..? Imagine one without girls...
I'm not being biased about girls. Boys are subject to a silent yet overpowering discrimination. Boys never get an equal and safe space to emote. Why are they called girls if they cry? Why can't they be vulnerable and fragile?
Why do widows have to give up colours, mehendi, certain jewelry and being a part of important occasions? Why is she taken to mean inauspicious because her husband died before her? I hate to see my mother in law standing behind when she pushes us ahead to take part in weddings, poojas or such other ceremonies.
Wives helping their husbands in business are mostly not welcome. I heard someone say "We won't eat from the money women earn". Does that make them less of a man?
Many would ask me to shut up but I have started questioning just yet.. Call me a torture or a question-pedia. But the fact is, we are rebels if we question and are we logically alive if we don't..?
CHEERS!
GOD BLESS!!
CHS
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