No Return...

I haven't been busy all this while that I could not write but something had jumped up the priority list and pushed my hobby way behind...  But something drastic shook me back to reality and I now know that if I don't do what I love now, I just might not get the opportunity to do it again. I have always believed and shared that Life is too short but hell I never knew that I would have to go through something so painful to realize the same.

I lost a very dear friend RJ and this world has lost a great human being. Besty to my sis. I knew him from my school days, (He's a couple of years older than me) and we were friends very soon and good friends sooner. It wasn't difficult for him to make anyone smile or happy.. All he knew was to make friends and spread cheers among them. Never took life seriously (never showed rather) It fills me with utmost sorrow to write about him using past tense but sooner or later we will have to accept that no matter how long we wait or how badly we miss him, he is just not going to revert. 

There's a confession I have to make. I should have clarified this with him but that will never be possible now. During my college days, I had been influenced by someone important (at that time) to stop talking to RJ and have no contacts with him thereon. I know you must be thinking How could I, but ya I actually ignored him totally ever since. RJ and my sis had all questions for me but I refused to answer. Finally they let me be but he never stopped asking about me. It rips my soul as I now know that I lost a valuable friendship for so many years. So here's a tip - " Never be influenced by someone, anyone. Not in the matter of choosing your friends!"  It might hurt to fight for someone you care for but trust me it kills you when the person who matters is not around for life...

Eventually I got in touch with him again and he was immensely happy for my decision to settle down but I never let him become the same friend he was. (Though he had valued me just the same) I recollect the good old days... He had flown down form Mumbai just to spend 2 days with me because I was upset, had spend my 18th birthday with me and planned the day with the most warm and touching surprises.. He would get me chocolates and gifts whenever we met but most importantly just be there at the hour of need. He always was, but never will now on.. I look at his number and wonder if he would pick my call. I now wish I should have talked more, listened more, cared more, believed more, lived more.

He has left us with the sweetest memories and most brutal truth of life - Inevitable End. I can only pay tribute to him by living life like he did. Doing what you feel is right, never hurting loved ones and going way beyond boundaries for the sake of dear ones. This write up is too short to be dedicated to him but my words would never touch our lives the way he did. 

If only he could see our tears and know that we still need him, If only I could do something to bring him back (may be not for me but for the ones who loved him so much) If only we could reach him... But he has conveniently  and very selfishly left us all to miss him while he can watch us over. He has indeed reached somewhere we can't reach him, from where there is no return..

Miss you RJ....

Rest In Peace!

God Bless and bestow strength upon those who love you...

CHS